2017, as I would always say, was "a WHOLE joke". This gif was me everyday this year. Yes, I'm exaggerating because I had triumphs, but lawwwd some days of this year made no kind of sense. I am so happy that I started this semester with much enthusiasm, because It has given me sufficient encouragement. Yes, I love to motivate my readers, but.. what happens if things don't go exactly as planned? What happens if you try, try, TRY again, but you .. FAIL. Yes, I don't believe in claiming L's, but this blog is about transparency, so take a breath and Relax. You will try, and you might fail, but It is okay.
I listen to the Podcast "Cool Soror" with Rashan Ali. It refreshes every single time! I learned from an interview with Dr.Kimberly Manning that you can have a Fixed Mindset or a Growth Mindset. The Growth Mindset is where even if you fail and things don't go perfectly, you look at everything as an opportunity & it's potential. A Fixed Mindset is that your success becomes defining of who you are & so when you fail, you unravel. I wasn't exactly instilled with a Growth Mindset, because My mother didn't always given room for failure. I had to instill that mindset in myself while in college, reminding myself that if i didn't win, it was okay, because eventually, I would. I've learned to praise myself for the efforts I've made
1. Put it rest and try another day
Overworking and overthinking does not make it better. If it's not going as planned, it's okay to stop, relax and try again another time.
2. Don't be afraid to ask for help
If you have a spirit of independence like I do, asking for help will be your last resort. However, sometimes it is better to ask for help from someone with experience, than to be clueless and make the same mistakes more than once.
3. Fear of Failure:
Some of us, truthfully speaking, just cant afford to fail. Literally. If you had all the money in the world, you probably wouldn't make the extra effort that you make now. That should give you enough motivation to go the extra mile and persevere through every obstacle that presents itself. While everyone is up to other things, it is up to you to stay up and burn the midnight oil. How bad do you want it ?
"The heights of great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight, but they while their companion slept, were toiling, working, through the night"
Furthermore, fear and faith can't remain in the same place. Sometimes it gets the best of us who are hopeful in our plans for the future but it is important that we learn to trust the process. Think of all the times you thought it didn't work out and it did ! Don't let that F word hold you back.
4. Learn from it
I could write a book about all the lessons of my collegiate years. I didn't have it all together all the time, but I learned from each mistake that helped to build my work ethic. I became more prepared, more mature & I worked harder. There is a lesson in every situation, no matter how minuscule it may appear. "That didn't go as planned.. but what should I do next time ? How can I do it better ?"
5. Don't let failure crush your self-esteem
You are not defeated! Give yourself time to process things but don't be too hard on yourself. Remind yourself that you are capable to do much more than you cqn ever imagine & as Dr. Kimberly Manning said from the podcast, commend yourself for all efforts you've made. There are many who have not had the opportunity to get this far, so be proud of yourself !
